Can’t Make Up Your Mind?
Life is full of tough choices. If you’re currently stuck in a quandary, consider the fact that you could be faced with much harder options from which to choose. You might’ve, for example, unknowingly disturbed a sleeping Djinn and then found yourself having to make really terrible choices such as these:
♠ Would you rather swim naked through a city block of sewage or keep a severed fish head in your underwear for a week?
♠ Would you rather eat bumble bees or poison ivy?
♠ Would you rather have teeth made out of chalk or a bellybutton that continually seeps a black, oily discharge?
♠ Would you rather have nerves in your fingernails or no nerves in your happy place?
♠ Would you rather brush your teeth with a used toilet scrubber or wipe your ass with 60-grit sandpaper?
♠ Would you rather smell strongly of cat piss or wear a sweat-stained maternity bra on your head the rest of your life?
♠ Would you rather spontaneously belch whenever anyone says your name or end every sentence with: “So sayeth Plumpy the Wet Booger!”
♠ Would you rather be the corpse-eating sidekick of an immortal serial killer or Ann Coulter’s sex slave?
Yeah, your silly dilemma doesn’t seem so tough now, does it? So pick already!
Comments
2. Bumble bees, they might taste good. Either one is going to cause to suffocate...
3. Belly button that seeps and oily discharge. Gotta eat.
4. Nerves in fingernails, hands down. No pun intended.
5. Wipe ass with 60 grit sandpaper. I'm just tough down there.
6. I already wear a sweat stained maternity bra on my head. What?
7. So sayeth Plumpy the Wet Booger. Just cuz it sounds cool.
8. Corpse eating sidekick. Ann Coulter doesn't deserve a sex slave. The world of BDSM requires intelligence, she has limited faculties in that area.
"Plumpy the Wet Booger"!! :-D
You're right about that. What's more, I used to think that a shiny PVC dress could add some sexy to any woman. Oh, how wrong I was.
Wish someone had told me earlier...
Um...what was the difference, again?
Awesome. You, sir, are my kind of funny.
I believe so, yes. Or at least half again as heinous.
Here's a thought: what would you think of people who chewed their nails? :O